Musing On Life

As I have searched for calm amidst the chaos I was raised in it has been, as if, this quest to quiet the voices and still the turbulent waters was always mean to be an arduous adventure. One, that at times, has felt fruitless and vein.

About five months ago I reframed what I wanted to focus on and entered therapy to address my ineffectiveness at interpersonal relationships, specially romantically. Simultaneously, I started group therapy to learn how to mange emotional charged situations and gain skills to regulate my own emotions. The difference in my own life was noticeable almost immediately as I learned how to identify what was happening within myself and then communicate from there. This approach didn’t heal the trauma I endured, in fact that which I still carry realistically wont fully be healed without holding the hand of another. What it did, was help create peace and quite within me so that I could enjoy the moment.

This had me musing earlier today, human beings are relational: we need other people. What if the trick to healing trauma is not to focus on the event which caused damage, but to repair the fracture in connecting with other humans? What if we were meant to heal each other? Not through intentional use of key phrases, but through being ourselves and genuinely existing near those within our sphere of influence. How much different would society be if we existed this way?

Maybe, the damage of trauma is not in the effect the event upon our psychosis but the ripping of our trust in humans. Humans we need to function effectively. If this were the case, then the greatest step in healing is restoring your own trust in others. A monumental task, I know.

If you came here for a poem, there is none.

—— EJB